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nothing to be worried about that shit isn't real but it is aesthetic as fuck

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"contributing the common good on our terms is mandatory" - a bunch of thieves with guns

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i'm not opening the IDE; i'm opening a portal to the Void, through which i drag into reality the ideas i catch

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subtooting entire fediverse 

cats can have little a self-esteem, as a treat

having your shitposts be under NDA is painful

drug joke 

scheduling a 420 tweet at :20 for a span of 12 hours to account for timezone differences

i guess a pithy summary would be "not keeping together as i want you to think but way more than the circumstances warrant"

for the first time in a while, my stomach didn't twist into a knot when i noticed the dawn breaking

boys on the internet: Hi! I like cute things and anime! Let's be cute together!
girls on the internet: i'm going to chug this six-pack of beer and punch a street sign

where we're going, there's no spell, no ward, no incantation that will save you

you'll just have to wing it

i almost reposted this verbatim elsewhere and i am my worst enemy

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it's a basic bitch take but cops are not human

maybe it's an exosuit over a human but it has the intelligence of a mid-tier dog

and the K-9 units are there so that someone has domain experience

cw cops, animal suicide mention 

the only cop you can't perfectly stonewall is one that's in your head

but since it's made of you you already know how to drive it to suicide

they told me i could become anything so i became multifarious

total alienation cannot be reversed, except by becoming alienated from alienation itself

no, fool, it doesn't work *because* you believe in it

although i said that already

i had some coffee and my third eye is wide open now

i am really sad that i squashed that spider, but to be fair, it was on my face

i practiced reaching out for the fabric of dreams and realigning them until i could do it in my sleep

which i thought was the point but apparently people just use it to convince themselves they've astral projected

it is generally wise not to mistake your player character for you, lest you become part of the scripted events

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